To reach a port we must sail, sometimes with the wind and sometimes against it. But we must not drift or lie at anchor.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes
Here we are, counting down the hours to start another year, hoping that it will be better than the one we had. But let’s stop hoping and praying! Let us invest all our positive energy to make this year a different one, a special one.
First step
Write down all your achievements and on a different paper, all your failures. Now focus on all your failures. Process each and every one of them and see why you haven’t succeeded in your targets. Where they reachable or where you expecting too much? Where they within your power or did you have to depend on others to achieve them? If your goals weren’t reached out of other’s disrespect, ignorance, insensitivity, and lack of responsibility, than it is about time to stop depending your happiness on people who are not reliable. If you do not do so, you will be spending your life roaming in a labyrinth.
If you feel that you can’t move on as you are still haunted by your past, change the perception you have on your past. First and foremost, if it’s a past, why are you still keeping it as your present? If it’s a past, let it be a past. Don’t keep on feeling angry, ashamed or guilty about it. It has managed to change you so why not also change your perception towards it? Think about it. This is the main reason why you are still letting it controlling you. This is why you are still feeling stagnated and haunted by it. Whatever might have happened to you has made you a different being so do not compare your life with that of others. Everyone has his/her own story and everyone has dealt with it in a different way. Never change yourself for the sake of those who cannot understand or accept the new you. Remember that many people wear masks because they are afraid of being their true selves and that is why relationships with them fail for all they do is to mislead. If you decide to be one of them, you will never be able to know your true self and your true happiness. Everyone has his/her own dark world but not everyone tries to enlighten it with the true values of life. Instead they try to fill it with a superficial and a very dangerous light, which is anything that gives them a feeling of escapism.
You know very well that if you feel unhappy, alcohol and drugs will directly attack your emotional state and thus make you feel much worse. Enjoy your drink and not drown in it .Never touch drugs. They are only a one way trip to hell, no more, no less. They are just a dreadful illusion leading only to great sufferance and pain. Do realize that drug dealers do not use drugs. If they were as good and beneficial as they say they are, why don’t they take them themselves instead of just selling them?!
Back to your list.
Second step
Focus on your achievements. Don’t they fill you with a great sense of fulfillment, pride and serenity?! Could this overwhelming emotion ever be replaced by any type of addiction? Your achievements will help you grow in every way. They will make you fell confident and happy about yourself so keep on investing on them. Keep your achievement list where you can see it everyday for it serves as a great motivator to keep on going. Never let other people discourage you. I have insisted over and over again that if you rely your happiness on other people, be it anyone, you will spend your life in frustration.
Third step
In one of his books, De Mello wrote:
“I didn’t have any shoes and I was always complaining about not having shoes, until I met someone who had no feet!”
Appreciate what you have. We tend to take everything for granted and that is why we are always wanting for more. Embrace and love what you still have, especially if it’s your family. Nothing can replace family. Don’t fall into any mischievous traps!
Wish you strength, courage, determination, love and serenity. Own these traits and live a better year!
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